“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” Most of us know that statement isn’t true. Words can destroy dreams, kill hopes and make wounds that last a lifetime. With our mouths, and using modern technology of the internet our words soar like arrows, pierce others like bullets and can cause massive destruction.
SAY WHY?
James 3:1-12 describes how difficult it is to tame the tongue, declaring that taming the tongue is like placing a bit in a wild horse’s mouth, a rudder of a ship unable to steer its course, or a spark that sets the entire forest on fire. And, what we say, spoken or written, can hasten the spread of gossip, slander, exaggeration, lying, manipulation, complaining and bullying. Out of our woundedness comes our response. Squeeze a tube of toothpaste too much, and you’ll find most of the contents not only on the toothbrush, but all over the sink! What we have inside, what we think of the other, the situation, ourselves, comes out. Most of us know an email, text or tweet sent with all caps indicates screaming, the tone of the message. Likewise, our tone; condescending, angry, vengeful, jealous, envious, bitter, or indifferent will inflict damages.
SAY HOW?
In the moment, stop; breathe, count to ten or more and ask yourself; 1) “Why am I angry?”,2) “Am I speaking from my own hurts?”, 3) “Is what I’m about to say intended to hurt or heal?”, 4) “Will what I say damage any relationships?”, 5) “Do I see the other as created by God, just as I am?”, 6) “Does what I am going to say glorify God?”, 7)“Do I need to say anything at all?” (Proverbs 13:3) Our words have great power and reflect more about what we think than we realize.
SAY SO!
Pray! Ask for Holy Spirit power for self- control. Be prepared. Study God’s word, memorizing scripture (remember the toothpaste tube; inside is what you think). Try to respond positively to insults (Proverbs 12:14, 16, 18), have courage (Psalm 18:30), look for good in others (2 Samuel 1:17-27), determine why you are angry (Romans 2:1).
Commit to love people, but not the wrongs done to you (Mathew 5:44), and love will spread like a fire (1 John 4:11-19), producing tangible actions (Hebrews 13:1-5). Finally, speak life because it comes from the very breath of God (Gen 2:7) and is to His glory.

© 2014 Linda Pope